I recently watched the movie ‘Stand By Me’. It’s a story of friendship, adventure and life. One of the last lines in the movie really struck a chord with me, though. It was something like “I don’t have friends like I had when I was 12. But then again, who does?” As of lately, friendship has been a sensitive subject to me. See, I just moved to Portland about 4 months ago. I was so excited because my best friend lives here and we’ve been apart for nearly 5 years; only visiting a few times a year for short periods of time.
When we were little, we were inseparable. We did everything together. And even when I felt like I had nobody, I felt like I at least had her. Well, since I’ve been in Portland, things don’t seem that way anymore. Don’t get me wrong, we probably get together a couple times a month but she’s not the same person she used to be. She’s more brazen and outspoken, almost to the point of it making me feel uncomfortable. She has new friends like this. And I get the vibe that her new friends don’t really like me, because I’m so not brazen and in your face. With her and her friends, its like an episode of Sex & The City, and I don’t fit in at all. I’m a little more reserved and I’m not interested in discussing women’s rights or having deep conversations, while drinking two bottles of wine back to back. I am a chill, relax, joke around, take nothing too seriously, sippin’ on some whisky and chasing it with a beer kind of gal.
Despite that, I try to go along, get along cause that’s just who I am. No drama. However, I’ve noticed lately that my friend, doesn’t seem like she cares anymore. When I text her, she’ll text me back something that doesn’t even make sense. For example – I texted her about having a cold and how it was kicking my butt and she wrote back “well that’s good, hope you feel better real soon”. What about me being sick is good? It was like she didn’t care or didn’t even read the text. I don’t often text her about stuff like that but her response just seemed so weird. It made me feel stupid. What did I do? Why does my friend seem uncaring or even annoyed?
Before this happened, I mentioned to my boyfriend that I felt like she was different and that I felt like she has more fun with her other friends than me. So whole thing didn’t really surprise me, but it still sucks that the one person I used to be so close with, is the person that I’m least close with now. How does that happen?
Any advice folks?